Happy Valentines Day-

I think you are wonderful!!!!

I can see the views I get on my blog- and you've made an impact on me.

((((((((((((((((((((((Big hug)))))))))))))))))))))))))

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rose for you :)

Too bad I can't give  chocolates *virtual chocolates for everyone*

and bacon. :)  bacon makes everything taste better.

except toothpaste (yes I've seen bacon flavored toothpaste, disturbing)

Thank you for reading this blog, from the bottom of my heart.

You are a blessing to me.

Today I have something on my heart- and I think it's for someone who is reading this... I'm including the link, and I'll search for the lyrics incase you can't get the link to work. :) 

It's true :) :)  I hope that's the link

Days will come when you don't have the strength
And all you hear is you're not worth anything
Wondering if you ever could be loved
And if they truly saw your heart they'd see too much

You're beautiful
You're beautiful
You are made for so much more than all of this
You're beautiful
You're beautiful
You are treasured, You are sacred, You are His
You're beautiful

Praying that you'd have the heart to fight
'Cause you are more than what is hurting you tonight
For all the lies you've held inside so long
They are nothing in the shadow of the cross

You're beautiful
You're beautiful
You are made for so much more than all of this
You're beautiful
You're beautiful
You are treasured, You are sacred, You are His
You're beautiful

Before you ever took a breath
Long before the world began
Of all the wonders He possessed
There was one more precious
Of all the earth and skies above
You're the one He madly loves
Enough to die

You're beautiful
You're beautiful
In His eyes

You're beautiful
You were meant for so much more than all of this
You're beautiful
You are treasured, You are sacred, You are His
You're beautiful
You're beautiful
You're meant for so much more than all of this
You're beautiful
You're beautiful
You are treasured, You are sacred, You are His

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Songwriters
PAGE, STEVEN / ROBERTSON, ED

Published by
Lyrics © Warner/Chappell Music, Inc., Universal Music Publishing Group, Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd., EMI Music Publishing 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Good morning!
So I am at the tale end of writing my memoir, and I lost it the other night, completely taking my husband off guard. It took me a while to figure out what the problem was..... and it was that I was "telling." WOW, that fear went deep. Here I am living this life where I have been restored and healed of so much, but I didn't realize I was still carrying that inside of me.

Don't tell- that fear controlled my life as a child. You just don't tell. Somehow keeping the secret was also attached to loyalty. I loved my mom, I wouldn't tell on her.

Maybe the loyalty feeling was the way I spun "don't tell" into something positive. Because, as I sit here and think of myself as a little girl and "telling," my heart beat speeds up. The real fear and power behind "don't tell" was that it would make things so much worse.

so much worse.

So here I am, fully an adult, and facing this for the first time.  Not loving it. But God got me this far, he will get me through this too somehow.

(((((((((((big hug to those who need it)))))))))))))))

Good morning! This is just a quick post as we are all gearing up for a new week.  Sometimes looking at the whole week can be overwhelming, so just take it one day at a time.  And make sure each day you take a moment to appreciate something good about yourself. (yes sappiness is sneaking in).  Sometimes that internal voice gets too much attention, and we need to remind ourselves- "Heck yes I did it! It might look messy, but I did what I needed to do."

((((((((((Big hug for those who need it today)))))))))))))))))

My pellet stove is cranked and I have a fire burning in the fireplace. Its 64 degees in my house. BRRRR! Are you snowed in where you're at?

I read about a blog the other day that has a bucket list... it's all things to do for other people. Isn't that cool? So the bucket list had things like, pay for someone's coffee, meal, give someone a flower.

Every now and then on facebook someone will talk about how the person in front of them paid for their coffee in the drive-thru. It really makes an effect.

I think we forget the positive effect we have on other people. We can get so down on ourselves. If we are going through a hard time we think we must be burdening other people. The truth is we like helping other people, so if you are in a spot where you need a listening ear or encouragement or other help, people do like giving it to you!

In the same way, the smile we give to each other, the listening ear we give, it all means something. It shows we see value in the other person.

Is value a weird word? I use it because there are so many things in this life that like to pound us that we have no value (not skinny enough, not smart enough, don't look like everyone else).

I'm using my sappy moment this week to say You have value. You are a blessing and I'm glad you're here. :D

(ps you know I mean it. I don't say things I don't mean :) )

Ahhh what a great weekend. Did you watch the Super Bowl? I loved it, but I realize not everyone did. What am I going to do with my Sundays now?

In the meantime, I've gotten my cover for my book and am waiting on the editor. YAAY! I started to read a  new book myself, Snow Child. Has anyone else read it? I kind of stumbled through the scene where she wanted to die.... hard stuff to read.

It reminded me of how often people feel unheard, or like nobody cares. Or maybe no one understands. It's a very lonely time. If you feel that way, ((((((((((big hug)))))))))))  You know by now I believe in God, and I know he cares about you. I mean, like a lot!

I've been through the crap of life to understand how trite those words sound (he cares about me? where is he now?) I can't answer why things happen, but I know he loves you. He really is right there. And it's okay to be honest with him. I've yelled, cried, told him all sorts of things... and he still cares.

Can I leave you with these thoughts?


(Isaiah 41:10) I have chosen you and have not rejected you. So do not fear, for I am with you: do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you;

(Isaiah 41:13) For I am the LORD your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you.

(Hebrew 13:5) "Never will I leave you;
never will I forsake you.”

(Romans 8:38-39) . . .For I am convinced that neither death nor life nor angels nor governments nor things now here nor things to come nor powers nor height nor depth nor any other creation will be able to separate us from God’s love that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Forgiveness- If only it were a light switch to flip on. If only after it was given, every negative emotion was really erased.

Sometimes, it feels like I am giving them a free pass for what they did to me. It’s hard to be hurt so much and never have recourse.

Yet, through forgiveness was the only way I could find freedom.

I discovered that trick pretty early on. I was desperate to be free from the pain inside, so I tossed out forgiveness to my parents as fast as I could.

I forgive them, I forgive them, I forgive them

Except I really wasn’t.

It wasn’t that I wanted to hold a grudge, or be bitter. It was the fact that I didn’t want to really acknowledge what they did that I was forgiving. For me to acknowledging the pain that happened to the ‘little girl me’ hurt too much. Easier to sweep it under the rug.

Especially since I still saw my parents. Especially after my mom told me her only regret was that she didn’t hit me more.

Forgiveness…..

It’s not for them. It’s for you, and me.

There are steps to it, just like with grief, that I found I couldn’t skip.

Step one- find a way to get it out. The best way, find someone to talk with (a good counselor if you can afford it. Yes you are worth it.) If nothing else, write it out, as much as you are able too. When someone told me that I cringed.

(PS- you haven’t failed if you can’t do it yet)

You are loved. You are so worth love.  There will be beauty from these ashes, if you haven’t seen it yet. If you have, MORE is to come. J

 Forgiveness- what does it mean to you?